Why is that when we are faced with unrestricted freedom, we feel weighed down by the enormity of choice? That even though we can entertain anything that our hearts delight in, we feel the absolute weight of the unlimited choices we have before us.
I’m feeling it right now, that weight. For the first time in my adult life, I have the freedom to do so many things that I just simply wouldn’t get the chance to do if I still had the life I left behind. I am removed from my core network of loved ones and the sounding boards for my life decisions. Now those decisions are all at my door, they are all mine to make. And I’m finding it hard to diminish the noise and let that inner voice tell me what to do.
Sometimes you just have to follow your inner voice, your inner light.
Right now I just have to keep doing the things I love, that fill me up from the inside, that make me feel me. I have to keep taking photographs, every day. I have to keep writing, every day. It’s my creativity that needs the routine that my rational self has mastered so well. The discipline of my rational self needs to work for my creativity, not against it. I can then give my rational side a purpose, and my soul and it’s creativity the true outlet of expression that it’s been long denied.
I know that it doesn’t reduce the amount of choices that I have, or even the inherent pressure by people enquiring as to my plans. If I just listen to that inner voice I have inside, and not worry so much about the outcome, the choices won’t be so hard, the path will become clearer. At some point.
